I have wanted a baby since the day I said I do but we decided that probably wouldn't be the best thing at the time as Maff was in Uni and we were living in a one bedroom flat in Kensington, in Liverpool - YUCK! But I'm grateful now that we made that decision because our lives are going to totally change now. In the past 3 years, we will have been able to have this time to really get to know each other and learn and grow together ready for our tiny Baba.
We found out the Sunday between Christmas and New Year so it was the most amazing late Christmas present and the most amazinggggg New Year's present. I was getting cramps in my stomach and was feeling soooooo tired but I just thought it was that time of the month so didn't get my hopes up. But my sister was over from Ireland and wanted me to take a test, just to make sure, because all of my family thought I was pregnant. So I did a test, (honestly I'm an expert at them things now, i've been pregnant so many times in the past two and a half years, even though I couldn't have been haha.) But I sat waiting, hoping and praying that the line going across would turn into two this time, and IT DID! I couldn't believe my eyes! I thought I had a faulty test. I ran into Matthew and just said "we're having a baby" and burst into tears. Matthew couldn't believe it. He was soo shocked. We ran downstairs to tell my family and got on the phone to Matthews family and everyone was crying haha, they were soo happy for us. Matthew was just in shock the whole day. He wouldn't put the test down and was so quiet. We went for a little drive, just us two, to our spot by the Lake, and he had a little cry (but shhhh don't tell anyone.) By the way, it was a happy shock and happy tears haha, just thought I'd make that clear.
At about six weeks I had to have an early scan as I had a little bit of spotting. I was absolutley mortified. I couldn't stop crying, I thought that we had lost our little pip. We sat in the hospital and my heart was racing. I just wanted everything to be okay. The nurse put the gel on my stomach, which is freeeeeeezing by the way, and rolled it around a little and said "okay so there's your pregnancy..anddddd there's the heartbeat. Everything is fine." and there it was, our little tiny shrimp with a fluttering little heartbeat. I wanted to cry! It was the most amazing thing. Matthew knew all along that it was fine but was still so happy to see our little baby's heartbeat. After that, my 12 week scan seemed soooo long away. I went through the early pregnancy symptoms, which, even though I complained every single day, I was pretty lucky really. I was actually only sick once but just felt soooooo sick every day and was over the toilet many a time and just wanted to sleep alllllllllll the time- I really don't know how people can work their full time jobs.
I had my booking in appointment and they took some blood ewwww!! (I was wayy scared- how the heck am I going to cope in labour?) and then finalllllllly on the 19th February my 12 week scan had arrived and alllll week the nerves came back, I couldn't sleep properly and the scan was all I could think about. Again, I lay on the bed while the Nurse put the gel on, again freeezzzzing and I reallllly needed the loo haha, and I just kept watching Matthew. As soon as the Nurse started rolling around my belly, Matthew had the biggest grin on his face that you've ever seen and said "there's the baby.... it's a wriggler isn't it?" again I wanted to cry (I'm such a cry-er?!).. Then I knew everything was okay, I was sooo happy. When the Nurse finally turned the screen to me I couldn't believe it. I thought it would be like a blob and we wouldn't really be able to make out anything but it was soooo clear, and it had the biggest head ever - I am terrified for labour when it will be even moreeeeee gigantic waaahh. But, it was perfect. It had one hand on it's belly and one on top of it's head and looked like it was in a little love heart - so cute! The Nurse said everything is fine and where it should be at this stage yayyyyy!!
So now, we have to wait for the 16th April for our 20 week scan - how soon is that?! - The 3rd of September will be here in no time - and we get to find out if it's a boy or girl hopefully eek!! I'm still feeling superrrrrr exhausted and occasionally a little queezy and honestly, I want to eat alllllllllllllll the time! Except chocolate, I actually hate chocolate and fanta orange right now blerrrk!! But Maff and I are just sooooo happy and excited to be a Mummy and Daddy and to love this tiny baby, even more than we do now, if that's possible, and teach it and help it to become who they want to be. We know it's not going to be perfect, living in my parents house but at the same time I'm soo happy about it as I'll have my Mum here when I need her the most and in the long run, everything will be perfect for our little baby because we'll be able to save up and spoil it later on hehehe!! <3<3
